How to Study While Insane
Notes to Self: How to Study While Insane
MAKE COFFEE. Medium latte with a spoon of honey. Eat a waffle and an orange or something.
Get online. Check email and facebook crap, read the news. Close all but two tabs.
Go to dictionary.com on one tab, Pandora Radio with the other. Click on the Paris Combo list on Pandora.
Open reading in separate window, open Word in another for note- taking. Refer to dictionary.com whenever a word comes up that you haven’t heard in use since Gross Anatomy eight years ago, as Dictionary.com is counterintuitively better than www.medical-dictionary-online.com.
Click (control)+ a few times so you can lean back in a comfortable, if chiropractically ill- advised, position in your chair (usually in a half- fetal position wrapped in a blanket or four) and still read the font.
Ocassionaly get up to add ginger and orange peel or whatever to beef stir fry stuff in the crock pot, make small talk with wanderers stopping in to use the wi- fi or game with Matt, answer munchkin questions, usurp the bathroom.
Combination of caffiene, smooth jazz, and brain occupaion help create perfect intercranial atmosphere for the ignoring of vaccuuming, arguing, three- way discussions in the other room, people borrowing and replacing and tossing things onto my desk, company roaming in and out, people asking questions.
WARNING: COFFEE BEGINS TO WEAR OFF AFTER 2-3 HOURS. Mood gradually changes from floaty- comfortable concentration to hungry- and- need- and- creative- outlet distractability. People begin to flee perfect boring environment, causing changes in overall ambiance.
Solution: lukewarm Mango Ceylon tea. Too hot and your brain goes fuzzy, too cold and the effects are nullified.
Eat something. Chips and salsa. Tabbouleh. Squash. Pozole. SOMEthing.
Change Pandora playlist from Paris Combo to Solace.
Open Irfanview and edit photos in another window if brain wanders.
If it wanders too much, take a shower or a bath and do spa stuff and go over belly dance routine.
Caveat: IF IT IS SUNNY, YOU CANNOT STAY INSIDE. If you try, you’ll just end up staring longingly out the window. Take a walk somewhere and take pictures, or you will NOT be able to concentrate for shit. If it is not sunny out close the study off, clear the floor, and dance.
Late afternoon is too exhausting and distracting to study. Usually. Eat something and listen to Wait Wait… Don’t Tell Me! on NPR or watch the Flogging Molly “Float” video again. Once refreshed, study can begin anew.
As a general rule, sensing that you are relaxed brings everyone back into the sphere to ruin the mood. Return to reading. Go to Pandora, click on Trivium playlist.
People flee. Continue enjoying Trivium, Slayer, et al., or click Type O and Tool playlist depending on mood. Return to reading and note- taking. If attention is still wandering, switch to other reading assignments.
Practice Arabic. Go over phrases and words six or seven times, write each version of each character five times while repeating sound. Practice writing your name.
Eat a meal of some sort. Drink a giant glass of water or ice tea and take vitamins.
Play some Loreena McKennit to relax while reviewing notes. Check the time. If it’s after 10 p.m. on a school night, close out of everything and begin tooth- brushing, face- cleansing, tracking- down- person(s)- responsible- for- disappearance- of- dental- floss ritual.
Get shit ready for morning. Load backpack. Find some kind of food that can travel and doesn’t mind being smashed. Make sure phone is charged. Double- check assignments due. DON’T FORGET THE YOGA MAT.
Grab Palaeoepidepiology book and headphones and get in bed. Doze off trying to make sense of tables.
This SHOULD get you ready for tomorrow’s discussions, notes, etc. Unless you forgot to do laundry, eat, stay hydrated, take your B vitamins and calcium, or shower. Then you’ll be too distracted to think straight and possibly make an ass of yourself. Best thing to do under these circumstances is keep your damn mouth shut.
This concludes today’s episode of Notes to Self. Stay tuned for How to Deal with Whiny Bitches Without Screaming. If you remember to write it.
February 07 2010 08:25 pm | animals and college and culture and kids and life and mental health and photography and school and utah
February 8th, 2010 at 4:52 pm
I wish I had time to write notes to myself.
February 19th, 2010 at 5:49 pm
The most fascinating thing here is the choice of Pandora Radio stations……
March 19th, 2010 at 8:44 pm
lol quite a few of the remarks many people put up make me laugh, every so often i ponder if they seriously read the content pages and content before writing a comment or whether they merely look at the subject of the post and submit the initial thought that drifts into their minds. in any event, it really is pleasing to browse through smart commentary every now and then as opposed to the same, old blog vomit which i mainly discover on the net i’m off to take up a couple of rounds of facebook poker cheers